I have been with the same boy for the last 3 years. Which might be crazy to hear considering I am only 18. (That isn’t the point though).
When we first started dating, which was our freshman year of high school. I was completely clueless, which I mean most people are when it comes to their first serious relationship. The internet filled my head with images and ideas of what my relationships should be like. The cute text messages, the cuddly pictures, you’re significant other constantly talking about you, and so many other things that truthfully are just not necessary.
At first, I thought that I needed that to be happy. I wanted my boyfriend to constantly text me, surprise me with gifts, and only spend time with me. Basically, I thought the relationship was ONLY supposed to be about me and my feelings. Those things I found on the internet filled my head with bullshit. I didn’t know what I was doing so I guess I figured the internet could show me how. Now I’m not saying that those things should or shouldn’t happen in your relationship, I am saying that these “goals” are mediocre. They are not actual goals, just things that happen (or don’t happen) naturally, and they come with time.
My point is that as I grew in this relationship I learn more and more about my boyfriend. And those “stereotypical” goals came and went and we moved on to bigger more important things. We learned how to communicate and be happy with just each other, and I didn’t need the internet’s help anymore.
What I hope you take from this is that seeing someone else’s relationship shouldn’t make you feel any different about your own. Seeing “goals” from other couples doesn’t mean those should be your only goals. Figure out what works for you and your significant other.
Till next time,