​January Recap

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Processed with VSCO with hb2 preset

January has almost come to end and what a month it has been to bring in the new year. A lot has already happened, and I am just gonne be honest, most of it isn’t good. Let me just share and explain and you will easily understand.

The month started rough, my dad and my stepmom are getting divorced. To me, it was unexpected and disappointing. I won’t go into too much detail about what actually happened between my parents, but I will say that I never expected divorce to come from it. Especially because they have only been together for about 6 years, and in my opinion, that is just too soon for a divorce. While I clearly remember what the divorce between my mom and dad was like, two of my sisters were too young to, and they took it incredibly hard. My half siblings are too young to understand what is going on, which I don’t know if that will be good for them or not, I am hoping it is for the better. It has been incredibly difficult for me, which I wouldn’t have expected. I am away at college, I cannot be there for my dad or siblings

as much as I would like too. It is a lot to take in, and no matter the troubles I have with my stepmom – I never would have wanted this.

About a week later my boss – who I was incredibly close too got fired for something that was not in her control. Without her their it left 3 college kids in charge, all who were in school. I felt like a huge responsibility was put on my shoulders – I am only 19 and a full-time student. All I want is a job that I can manage with school, and while I had a few weeks to figure things out it seemed impossible. Yet I had no idea what else was coming my way – they got rid of the assistant manager position in our district of the company (literally like a week and a half later). Well, I have heard that it was a long time coming, nothing could have been worse for our store. I am basically bossless and I have too much to handle while I am in school. I have contemplated quitting but I can’t afford to just not have a job, and trying to find other jobs with small shifts seems impossible.

I am currently writing this from my dorm room – school started again. As you can see I am seriously overwhelmed. I simply do not want to be here, I have very little keeping me here and with all the stress in my life right now, I would like to move on with my life. Unfortunately, that is all a lot easier said than done.

Overall this month has kinda been a shit show. There really is no other way to put it. I was trying to do yoga for a month straight, I have completely failed that.

I did do a few new fun things.  By far the best thing has been thrifting, I find it quite stress relieving and relaxing. I found some good things, but I have also realized I have too many clothes, almost nothing fits in my dorm anymore. So I am trying to limit myself, but I think that just may be easier said than done.

Anyway… That has been my month in review. I pray that February is much better.

Also, I think I will continue to do these little “recaps” not only for content and sharing but so that next year I can look back and reminisce.

Til next time,

Faith

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Where is my oversized sweater weather?

This last few days, scratch that, WEEKS have been hotter than any day I experienced this summer. They have been anywhere from 75 to 90 degrees. The real struggle though is not knowing how to dress for the day. This is basically what my daily routine has become:

7am: Cold enough to wear a t-shirt and jeans, maybe a sweatshirt.

7:45am: Walking to class, you start sweating, cause humidity decide to pick up in the last 45 minutes.

7:55am: You’re relieved cause the buildings are much cooler than outside.

8am: You start sweating again, because no part of these building are the same temperature.

9am: You get out of class and head outside to realize it is now 15 degrees hotter than when you first went to class.

PLEASE tell me anyone else has struggled with this. I literally have no idea how to dress for class in the morning so I end up going through like 3 different outfits. If any one has any tips let me know. I would greatly appreciate them, other wise share your stories if you can relate!

Til next time,

Faith

Negativity has gotten the best of me. 

A question I frequently ask myself is “why am I always so angry?”

Well don’t get me wrong, I am not always angry. I just feel like such a negative person. I complain a lot, and I do very negative things that I would tell others not to, and to be the bigger person. 

For example,  I can be extremely hypocritical, I will yell at my boyfriend for saying something completely rude and do something similar in the next 30 minutes. To be even more honest with you, there are 100 other examples. I tell myself that it’s not fair, and I wish I wasn’t that way, I don’t like being that way. But I guess it’s important that I know it’s wrong. 

Other times, for some awful reason, I really like to start arguments. Believe me it is not my proudest ability. I don’t know whether it’s the attention or the feeling of “winning” but I like to argue. It usually starts out as me wanting to talk about a problem or my opinion, but ends up with me screaming or something else that is completely idiotic. 

I feel like this makes me sound like a completely awful person, I think it is important that I acknowledge things about myself. That I know how have an area to work on in my communication skills and that as I grow and learn things will become easier. 

Does anyone else feel disappointed in themselves for not necessarily being the person they tell others to be? 

Till next time. All the love, 

Faith  

Busy, Busy, Busy

I’ve got some down time for once, so here are my thoughts. Thanks for reading! 

I’ve already been out of school for over a month, but summer literally just started (I mean the summer solstice).  It’s so crazy to me that time has flown by, and. I feel like I’ve wasted it. 

Which I mean that’s probably not true, I’ve done a few fun things. For the most part though I’ve been working my butt off. I work at a children’s clothing store, and I just got offered a manager position (which is crazy ’cause I only started in March). I’ve been training, learning and busting my butt. 

Unfortunately because it’s summer time and my job is in retail, I end up working weird hours. Some days I open, others I close, sometimes I work smack dab middle of the day. Because of that I feel like I see no one. My parents work 9 to 5 jobs, so it’s really tricky to see them. Then there’s my boyfriend and best friend who also have jobs, and also work weird hours. My boyfriend works WAY more then I do, so anytime he’s available I jump at the chance to see him.  My best friend has basically completely opposite hours of each other (or at least it seems that way. We are push on not seeing each other for a week and it feels much longer). 

It’s just so crazy that the world is passing by and well everything that is happening to me. I feel like I need to be making fun mermories instead of just “work” memories. 

Anyone have any ideas on what to do to add a little life into the rest of my summer? 

Your busy midwestern girl, 

Faith