My first few days…

Here is a recap of what my first 5 days of college has been like:

Sept 3rd: Move-in Day

“It is the big day. I am starting fresh, and I am gonna meet new people. I am gonna have so many new experiences and opportunities.” That’s what I kept telling myself.  Moving in is probably one of the most irritating things I have ever done in my life, and I scream at my family and my boyfriend so many times over absolutely nothing. Let’s just say I deeply apologize for acting that way. I held back my tears until I hugged my mom goodbye. I don’t understand why it was so hard, they’re only 20 minutes away. The day goes on with pointless meetings and information that I am 100% sure I have already heard before.  Safe to say that I was over it. Sleeping was weird, I was uncomfortable and took me forever to actually fall asleep.

Sept 4th: DAY #2

Woke up just to go a meeting about why you shouldn’t party, or at least learn to keep your priorities straight. It was funny but I was alone – my roommate went to help her boyfriend move in. I did meet some people but it wasn’t anything super life changing. They are super nice girls and I would totally hang out with them again, but I don’t want to get too set into making friends…class hasn’t even started.

By mid-day I was alone again. Roommate was with her boyfriend and the hall mates I met were doing other things! It was weird and I felt really lonely. I felt lost, like I was doing something wrong. I ended up meeting with a friend from high school. Which actually really helped. There was a glow party, thrown by the sororities on campus. I thought about wanting to join. I stayed out late,  but not because of the party, I ended up visiting with a coworker.

Sept 5th: Day #3

I skipped all the “mandatory” stuff. I was more than happy to do that. I got to find where all my classes were, which made me more excited and less upset about being here. I ended up eating lunch late and eating dinner early. Which means I won’t be eating much of anything for dinner. Not really the biggest deal. It was another night where I stayed at home by myself.  Not really my favorite thing but it will do. Maybe eventually I can meet some friends.

I ended up face timing my boyfriend, who is once again 20 minutes away. We are both struggling. I miss him. I miss having him around, I miss having someone to do stuff with. I would love if he could just be here all the time, but he can only stay for so long and we can only do so little until we become completely bored. It will just have to be something I figure out.

Sept 6th: First Day of Classes

Class is were good. I am optimistic. I am hoping that with time I will be able to find some friends and will be able to make it through the year successfully. I had lunch with my cousin (who I am so grateful to have) and some of the people she already knows. It kinda made me feel crummy about not really knowing anyone. But I pushed through and got to see her which really did make me feel better.

I went back to my dorm and showered and let me tell you that it is an experience. It definitely something I will probably never ever get use to. I then got to hang out with my boyfriend,  which also made me feel better. We got a few things that I could still use in my dorm and went and had dinner at Noodles & Co., which was actually really nice. When we finished dinner I really didn’t want to say goodbye. He kept telling me “I really just want to drive start driving home”. He feels my pain, but it doesn’t make it any easier.  I finished my homework from the day, which once again gave me hope for the semester.

Sept 7th: Second day of class

New day, new classes. I have an 8am today… definitely not a fan. It’s my communications class which made me dread it more. I don’t mind talking to strangers but as soon as something is for a grade I talk super fast and seemingly mess things up. This is gonna be a class I dread, I already know it. During my break I ate lunch by myself, which wasn’t that bad. It really wasn’t the worst thing in the world it was nice to be able to do what I wanted and catch up with the social media world. I finished lunch and took an adventure the financial aid office. Basically I have a loan and it’s super confusing, so they explained it to me and I should be good. I went back to my dorm watched some TLC with my roommate and her boyfriend. I have a new thing for ‘Out Daughtered’ it’s really good and intriguing, plus I just really love kids.

I went to my next two classes. My first one was psychology which I don’t think will be too hard considering that I had taken an AP psychology class already but never gotten the credit for it. After that a nursing lecture, this class easily excites me the most. I am very passionate about wanting to be a nursing and I am hoping that this class goes well for me. I walked back across campus to my dorm and recapped my day. Then went out for dinner with a bunch of friends from high school and to be honest it was the high light so far.

 

I am sorry that this is so boring, and that all of my writing have been so bland, I would like to write more now that I actually have something going on with my life. Please leave any tips for me that you would’ve liked to know when you started college or any advice on how to cope with being away from home. Honestly anything helps at this point.

Thank you for reading. Until next time,

Faith

 

 

 

Advertisements

Busy, Busy, Busy

I’ve got some down time for once, so here are my thoughts. Thanks for reading! 

I’ve already been out of school for over a month, but summer literally just started (I mean the summer solstice).  It’s so crazy to me that time has flown by, and. I feel like I’ve wasted it. 

Which I mean that’s probably not true, I’ve done a few fun things. For the most part though I’ve been working my butt off. I work at a children’s clothing store, and I just got offered a manager position (which is crazy ’cause I only started in March). I’ve been training, learning and busting my butt. 

Unfortunately because it’s summer time and my job is in retail, I end up working weird hours. Some days I open, others I close, sometimes I work smack dab middle of the day. Because of that I feel like I see no one. My parents work 9 to 5 jobs, so it’s really tricky to see them. Then there’s my boyfriend and best friend who also have jobs, and also work weird hours. My boyfriend works WAY more then I do, so anytime he’s available I jump at the chance to see him.  My best friend has basically completely opposite hours of each other (or at least it seems that way. We are push on not seeing each other for a week and it feels much longer). 

It’s just so crazy that the world is passing by and well everything that is happening to me. I feel like I need to be making fun mermories instead of just “work” memories. 

Anyone have any ideas on what to do to add a little life into the rest of my summer? 

Your busy midwestern girl, 

Faith 

“Relationship Goals”

I have been with the same boy for the last 3 years. Which might be crazy to hear considering I am only 18. (That isn’t the point though).

When we first started dating,  which was our freshman year of high school. I was completely clueless, which I mean most people are when it comes to their first serious relationship. The internet filled my head with images and ideas of what my relationships should be like. The cute text messages, the cuddly pictures, you’re significant other constantly talking about you, and so many other things that truthfully are just not necessary.

At first, I thought that I needed that to be happy. I wanted my boyfriend to constantly text me, surprise me with gifts, and only spend time with me. Basically, I thought the relationship was ONLY supposed to be about me and my feelings. Those things I found on the internet filled my head with bullshit. I didn’t know what I was doing so I guess I figured the internet could show me how.  Now I’m not saying that those things should or shouldn’t happen in your relationship, I am saying that these “goals” are mediocre.  They are not actual goals, just things that happen (or don’t happen)  naturally, and they come with time.

My point is that as I grew in this relationship I learn more and more about my boyfriend. And those “stereotypical” goals came and went and we moved on to bigger more important things. We learned how to communicate and be happy with just each other, and I didn’t need the internet’s help anymore.

What I hope you take from this is that seeing someone else’s relationship shouldn’t make you feel any different about your own. Seeing “goals” from other couples doesn’t mean those should be your only goals. Figure out what works for you and your significant other.

Till next time,

Faith

 

 

I’m the “Mom” friend 

There are the people who like to party, and drink and do crazy outrageous things that could possibly kill you. Those are my friends.  Then there are the people who are introverted, care a little too much, have to supervise and be the protector. That’s me.

I am the “Mom” friend. I always make sure there is enough food. I always make sure that no ones too drunk. If that happens to be the case I make sure someone can take them home safely. I make sure everyone’s having a good time, and that we aren’t disrupting neighbors. I alway make sure people don’t go to wild with putting gasoline on the fire or do something else that could possibly injure themselves in the process. I make it my job to protect everyone. I am always the responsible one.

Now I understand that what I’m about to say is just me complaining. I put the responsibility on myself, and I get that. But hear me out.

I am the party pooper. Well at least I feel that way, my friends always want to have a bonfire and drink while I would much rather just sit at home with two people and watch Netflix. Now don’t get me wrong I don’t mind having bonfires or hanging out with friends.  They always say, “it’s up to you” “I’m not making the decision” “well I don’t want to upset Faith”.

I know they don’t mean anything by saying those things, but it kinda hurts. They don’t want to upset me, which I’m grateful for, but do they honestly expect me to say no? I don’t want to ruin their whole night, I want them to have their fun and get home safe even if that means I am completely miserable 99% of the time.

I love my friends dearly and spending time with them is great, but I am sick of being the responsible one. I just want them to not be completely stupid without having to be supervised. I say that because we all go to different places in the fall, and I can’t just be there. (Yes, it is amazing but I do know that I can’t be there to watch them. )  I don’t want to worry about my friends being complete morons.

When I first had the idea to write this I wasn’t going to complain. I was just gonna talk about what it’s like to be the overbearing friend. Unfortunately, it took a very negative turn. I love caring for my friends and being there in any time of need but being the mom friend sucks. I love myself for who I am, but it would be cool if I didn’t have to be this way all the time.

I love caring for my friends and being there in any time of need. I think because of the person that I am, it makes it harder for me to have fun. I do love myself for who I am, and I do not blame my friends for that. I just wish that they wouldn’t give me so much to worry about.

Disclaimer: I understand that what I mention is illegal but please understand that we aren’t the types of kids to throw house parties or do something as outrageous in the movies. Remember at one point you were a teenager and you probably some pretty stupid and illegal things yourself.

 

“Friends” on Social Media

social-media-mobile-icons-snapchat-facebook-instagram-ss-800x450-3-800x450

Within the last month, I have found myself completely unfriending and unfollowing “friends” social media accounts.

By “friends” I mean people who go to my school, live in my town or even people I’ve seen walking down the street. They really aren’t friends but I find myself becoming interested in their life choices, or really what they choose to post on Facebook, Instagram or Twitter.

Like I said I’ve started to unfollow people I don’t really care for. By doing this I feel like I am getting away from the negativity, uncontrollable nosiness, and leaving behind people I generally don’t have any interest in. I think it will make me happier, but if it really upsets you here is your answer:

To those who I have unfollowed,

Maybe it was because I don’t like you, but that is okay.  If it really bothers you, I am sorry. I hope one day you can get over it.

Maybe it was because I don’t like what you post. It could be about your opinions, it could be that what you post is always negative. If it makes me upset to see what you constantly post then why should I follow you?

Maybe it is because we aren’t friends. We may just be acquaintances, but that is okay by me. If I really want to get to know you I would take the time out of my day, and not just scroll through your feed of pictures.

There are probably better reasons out there, but I just want to go forward with people I love and with lots of happiness. So please excuse me if I no longer want to be your “Facebook friend”. You keep doing you and I will keep doing me.